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 Captain T's song / poem writing.

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Captain Tezuka
I am picking my nose with a back scratcher. Got a problem with that?
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Join date : 2010-04-07
Posts : 4100


PostSubject: Re: Captain T's song / poem writing.   Wed Sep 15, 2010 11:50 am

Hey guys, I updated again. This one I wrote last night, and it's mostly about myself. Enjoy





Blood Red Petals So Sincere


How simple
Was our understanding
But your words have taken toll
I have paid for your mistakes
Paid in full
The petals falling
From the crevices of my heart
Are so purely red
If only I could wake with a start
But this endless discrepancy
Doesn’t find any end near
Your face can instill
In me so much fear
When I see you I know the end
Will no be far behind
Sometimes I wish I never knew you
But then I remember
All that you have gotten me through
I know I should be thankful
But this feeling is so intense
Betrayal and hate fill my veins
In my mind
I walk through hells lanes
But I really have so much more
Than many others have been dispensed
I should really appreciate this situation
I can’t find it in me to forgive
It’s hard enough just to live
I’m just looking at things with a faulty scale
I really need to brush off that hate
Grow up and get up
It’s not too late
This view of mine is really quite dim
I’ve got more to work with than most
I promise to improve all my sh*t
And you can be assured of it.



Discuss and comment, please.
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Mozzie
OHNOES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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Join date : 2010-03-04
Rank : Ex Staff

Posts : 5071


PostSubject: Re: Captain T's song / poem writing.   Wed Sep 15, 2010 11:59 am

Captain Tezuka wrote:
Here's another one that I wrote this morning. Two updates in one day!!

Beutiful Tricks



I wonder when
Enough will be enough
I wonder when
we'll end this
You suck the blood of me
I wonder when the end will be
You keep coming for my heart
You always leave with it in your hand
I keep falling for you I don't understand
You'd think I'd know better
Than to fall into your trap again
You've destroyed every fetter
Of the rules of love
You've used me so many times
You've played so many beutiful tricks
You're the mastermind
Of the destruction of my heart
That still I need to find
You love to watch me fall apart
All these atrocities you have commited
I've only had a start
You claw at me with talons so sharp
I pity the poor unfortanate soul
Who will be your next victim
Leave me alone so I can once again be whole




Comment / enjoy
O.O I applaud you for this! :D I felt it, dude! The feeling was really there. Very well-written. I loved it! :D

Captain Tezuka wrote:
Hey guys, I updated again. This one I wrote last night, and it's mostly about myself. Enjoy





Blood Red Petals So Sincere


How simple
Was our understanding
But your words have taken toll
I have paid for your mistakes
Paid in full
The petals falling
From the crevices of my heart
Are so purely red
If only I could wake with a start
But this endless discrepancy
Doesn’t find any end near
Your face can instill
In me so much fear
When I see you I know the end
Will no be far behind
Sometimes I wish I never knew you
But then I remember
All that you have gotten me through
I know I should be thankful
But this feeling is so intense
Betrayal and hate fill my veins
In my mind
I walk through hells lanes
But I really have so much more
Than many others have been dispensed
I should really appreciate this situation
I can’t find it in me to forgive
It’s hard enough just to live
I’m just looking at things with a faulty scale
I really need to brush off that hate
Grow up and get up
It’s not too late
This view of mine is really quite dim
I’ve got more to work with than most
I promise to improve all my sh*t
And you can be assured of it.



Discuss and comment, please.
Oh wow, beautiful. Very beautiful indeed. You have a talent, Spence... And well, I agree to what you said about life in your poem. Very well-thought poem. Liked it as well. Keep it up! LOL! I miss reading poems! ;) Glad you updated yours and Sam.
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Captain Tezuka
I am picking my nose with a back scratcher. Got a problem with that?
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Join date : 2010-04-07
Posts : 4100


PostSubject: Re: Captain T's song / poem writing.   Wed Sep 15, 2010 12:10 pm

Thanks Jannele ^_^ High praise from a pro like yourself *Smiles*
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Artrain
Eternally lazy
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Join date : 2010-03-22
Rank : Admin of Personnel

Posts : 1071


PostSubject: Re: Captain T's song / poem writing.   Thu Sep 16, 2010 10:59 am

Nice free verse it was. Your thoughts went about a lot. Certainly interesting to read, so I enjoyed it. Keep writing...

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Captain Tezuka
I am picking my nose with a back scratcher. Got a problem with that?
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Join date : 2010-04-07
Posts : 4100


PostSubject: Re: Captain T's song / poem writing.   Thu Sep 16, 2010 11:11 am

Thanks, I want you to post some more too man.
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Captain T's song / poem writing.

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