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 The Master Plan

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Lord of you
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PostSubject: The Master Plan   Tue Nov 16, 2010 10:06 pm

The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will be the official language of the European Union rather than German, which was the other possibility. enthusiasm in the sekond year when the troublesome "ph" will be replaced with "f".. This will make words like fotograf 20% shorter. kontaining "ou" and after ziz fifz yer, ve vil hav a reil sensibl riten styl. Und efter ze fifz yer, ve vil al be speking German like zey vunted in ze forst plas.



As part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded that English spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5- year phase-in plan that would become known as "Euro-English".



In the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c".. Sertainly, this will make the sivil servants jump with joy. The hard "c" will be dropped in favour of "k". This should klear up konfusion, and keyboards kan have one less letter.



There will be growing publik



In the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to reach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible.



Governments will enkourage the removal of double letters which have always ben a deterent to akurate speling.



Also, al wil agre that the horibl mes of the silent "e" in the languag is disgrasful and it should go away.



By the 4th yer people wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing "th" with "z" and "w" with "v".



During ze fifz yer, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from vords



Zer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi TU understand ech oza. Ze drem of a united urop vil finali kum tru.


Rofl I loved this when I found it :D
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Old Amsterdam
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PostSubject: Re: The Master Plan   Wed Nov 17, 2010 9:51 am

Yeah, that is rather amusing. And I wouldn't put it past the Germans to do it anyways. tongue

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PostSubject: Re: The Master Plan   Tue Nov 23, 2010 8:44 am

Very nice Sir Callan, but however, I can't quite understand it fully.... it is not clear english tho... Laughing

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PostSubject: Re: The Master Plan   Tue Nov 23, 2010 10:15 am

I think that's part of the point, Zach.

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The Master Plan

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